How to quickly free yourself after someone has unloaded their stuff onto you

Author Christiane Becht shares why negative emotions coming from others can leave you feeling irritated, frustrated or depressed—and what to do to get it out.  


You probably know this: you have a conversation with someone who unloads their frustration, depression or upset onto you - and afterwards you feel uncomfortable or even horrible. And you know you didn’t feel like that before. Now, perhaps you feel heavier or drained, maybe you feel irritated, or even just as upset or depressed as they were.


Do you have that one colleague, friend, neighbor or even family member who regularly does this to you? Then you definitely want to learn this ‘Energy Balancing’ tool I want to share here. 

You might have also experienced this ‘unloading’ with a complete stranger who has shared with you - and you were affected by it.


The problem is that most people don’t know what to do about this kind of ‘unloading’, and they carry this negativity on into the day. If this is you, you know that this doesn’t only spoil your mood and day, but it can also limit your ability to focus on your work, and affect the decisions you make. 


And you know how we all tend to pass our uncomfortable feelings on to others. You might end up being grumpy with your colleagues, lashing out at your spouse or kids, or retreating to avoid any of that, and as a result, ruining what could have been a nice time together.


Well, this should become part of the past if you use the following exercise. In ‘Energy Balancing’ we have a special ’remedy’ for this which works very quickly and effectively and is easy to learn. 

We call this energy tool “Scoop the Goop”. 

The reason for the name is that those negative emotions that come from others are really a type of thicker energetic ‘stuff’ (‘goop’) that clogs up your system.


Behind the effectiveness of this tool are two energy principles:

     a. Emotions are Energy and 

     b. Energy is Transferable.  


That means that when someone is sharing their negative stuff with you, their emotions are energy clouds (or lumps) that are literally traveling over to you. Not just words cross ‘the air’ between you—energy substance is being transferred.

After a conversation like this, their energetic (emotional) debris is now sitting in your field. While the other person probably feels better and lighter after meeting and sharing with you, you now carry their energetic debris. So your system is clogged up with this energy, making you feel heavier, befuddled or emotionally uncomfortable.


In our book, Your Energy in Action, there is a story and three great illustrations which show exactly what is going on. I’m sharing those illustrations with you here, as they speak for themselves: 



      3.14.1_kabir_antonio_aura.jpg            3.14.2_kabir_antonio_aura.jpg           3.14.3_kabir_antonio_aura.jpg





Does this look and feel familiar? 


And now comes the important point: if those negative emotions have been energetically transferred to you, that means you can get them out of your field.


It is as easy as that. You will be able to free yourself from negative emotions/energies that you have taken on from others. 


Here comes the ‘secret’ tool:


‘Energy Balancing’ Tool “Scoop the Goop” - How to free yourself from someone’s emotional stuff that has been unloaded onto you: 


1. Tune into the goop 

Tune into your energy system and try to sense the area in which that energetic debris sits. 


2. Charge your hands with energy

Rub your palms together quickly, as though you are washing them with soap. Then hold them a few inches apart. Notice the energy flowing between them.


3. Set your intention

Set the intention that with your ‘turned on’ hands, you will clear and release the thicker energetic stuff - the ‘goop’ - from your field. 


4. Scoop the goop 

Put your hands into this area, cup each of them and start ‘scooping’: Slowly move your hands outward, taking out the energies that aren’t yours. Empty that goop out once your hands are further away from your body (or whenever your hands feel full).




5. Use your imagination

You can imagine the energy there like mush that you scoop out of your energy system.


6. Shake it off

From time to time shake out your hands and breathe out deeply to release this thicker energetic stuff. Trust that the earth will naturally transform it. 


7. Completion - note if you feel the difference

Stand with your arms relaxed and your feet shoulder width apart. Take a few deep breaths and especially take note of the area that you just cleared.


As always, you get better at this the more often you use it. 


With this tool literally ‘at hand’ now, you no longer need to experience a day where someone unloads onto you and you carry aggravation into the rest of your day (or even unload it onto others). 

If you notice that you are carrying it on, then the other person clearly ‘pushed a button’ in you, which means they triggered an old wound you’ve been carrying which is calling to be looked at and (maybe with the help of a coach) healed and transformed.


Otherwise, from now on you will be able to clear these things out right away and feel freer, lighter and happier again.


This will improve your energy level, and you will be vibrating at a higher frequency (and radiate more positively). You will act better towards the people around you, concentrate well on your work again and be more effective, as well as healthy, and of course you will be a more loving spouse or parent. In short: you’ll be closer to the real you again!


Perhaps you would like to learn how to prevent such incidents from happening in the first place—and we’ll get to that in a later blog article. 

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If you notice that you are repeatedly affected by emotions and energies of other people (and places), please have a look at another article called Are you a highly sensitive person? There will be more on this topic coming in the future as well!

And of course, our book Your Energy in Action! talks a lot about how you can work with energy to recover more quickly from irritating or draining situations, how to protect yourself better - and how to thrive. You can find the book here. 

Finally, we love hearing about your experiences and thoughts, so please do use the comment box to share your questions, stories or tips.