Exercise: Playing with energy
One way you can increase your awareness is to play around with the energy you transmit as you say a simple phrase.
Here is an exercise, taken from our book Your Energy in Action! Energy Balancing for Daily Living, that you can do alone or, even better, with a friend. We will use the example of ‘giving advice’ as this is something we all love to do so much!
Think of someone you’d like to give some advice to; it doesn’t matter what, it can be big or small, profound or mundane. For the purpose of our example, we’ll use “You should buy a new car.”
Let’s use this simple phrase with slight variations and have different kinds of energy coming with it. I invite you to give the same advice in these three different ways using hand movements to really emphasize the different energies going out from you. In real life we don’t normally use our hands in these ways, but underneath our words we are using energy in exactly these ways!
1. Offering
Hold your hands in front of your chest with the palms facing upwards. Now move them slowly forwards towards the (imaginary) person you are talking to whilst saying the words “You could buy a new car.” Take note of how you feel and, if you are working with a friend, notice how they react. You can also ask them how it felt.
2. Pushing
Now again place your hands at chest height but this time with the palms facing away from you (as in the illustration below). Move them forwards away from your body with the words “You should buy a new car.” Notice how this feels to you and how your friend reacts.
3. Forcing
Finally, make your right hand into a fist. Put it up near your ear and, as you say the words, “You have to buy a new car,” punch the air in front of you with your fist. How did that feel? How did it feel for your friend and how did they respond?
I imagine you noticed quite a difference in how each of these energies made you (and your friend feel)! Whenever we express ourselves to others, no matter what we are saying, we send energy out in ways similar to those above, and people react accordingly.
You can experiment with this today as you interact with people. As you engage in conversation with friends, colleagues and even strangers stay alert and notice:
- What is the energy that you transmit with the words you say?
- How does this energy impact the person you are speaking to?
- What is their reaction to your energy or to what you are saying?
You can even try changing the energy you transmit and see what difference it makes to how the other person reacts. As you become more skillful with energy your relationships will naturally improve and that has the potential to really change your life.
Also, if you are really into moving your relationships to the next level, our book, Your Energy in Action! Energy Balancing for Daily Living, offers a lot more about energy awareness and skills for relationships.